those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
