dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize