Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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