So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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