her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
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Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
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I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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