Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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