with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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