you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
