I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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