I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
