What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
