i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize