I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize