i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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