if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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