I wanna passion pit in your ass
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Randomize