Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize