dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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