So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
