apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
