well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize