hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
