It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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