she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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