He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
he had hair everywhere except his balls
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