Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
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