Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Randomize
