just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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