ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I have so many feelings about this burrito
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
