he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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