I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize