erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
