i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Randomize
