they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
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