i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
