I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
