i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
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