I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
After last night, I could never be a politician.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
