kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
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