So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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