So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Randomize