Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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