I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
it glows. i had to have it.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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