In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Randomize
