I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
