If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
