this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
