how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I think a kid would responsible me up
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Randomize