I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Randomize
