You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
