We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
