Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
